m-it

Thoughts on a Healthy Lifestyle

2011-07-06T09:41:00.000-04:00

I read about an interesting study done recently that looked at sudden cardiac death in women and lifestyle factors associated with risk reduction. Sounds kind of boring, I'll admit, but the gist of the article is that a healthy lifestyle significantly reduces the risk of sudden cardiac death in women. This is important, because for everything we know about cardiac disease in men, the disease often manifests differently in women. Sudden cardiac death may be the first indication of underlying cardiac disease in some women. So I'm all about preventing it.

Four lifestyle factors in particular were found to have the greatest risk reduction, and they shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone.

Not smoking - kind of a no-brainer. I've never been a smoker, and I'm very glad of that. I have so many patients who want to quit smoking and just can't; it makes me sad for them. The decline in lung function and subsequent functionality is a tough consequence for people to understand, especially early on, when they don't feel poorly. It's not until significant lung function has been lost before people start to become symptomatic.
BMI <25. I'm still working on this one. I've struggled with my weight my entire life, but at least I'm headed in the right direction at this point. I haven't hit the magic number yet, but I'm hopeful that in the next year or so, I'll be where I want to be. Maintaining it is a whole other story, but one step at a time...
Exercise at least 30 minutes per day. I meet this goal on more days than not. I generally exercise in the morning when I first get up. Some weeks are better than others, but in general I try to be a fairly active person. Even if I'm not running or something like that, I like to be out in my garden pulling weeds and such. I make it a point to go up and down the stairs in my house multiple times per day.
Eat a healthy diet - defined as high in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, healthy oils, and moderate in alcohol. Yep, this one I've got covered. In spite of my problems with my weight, I don't eat poorly on the whole. I'll have a cheesy poof here and there at a party, and I do indulge in sweet desserts from time to time, but my daily diet always includes at least 5 fruits and vegetables, olive oil, and some kind of whole grain. I eat mainly lean proteins and fish. I do drink wine, but it doesn't get out of hand.

I felt pretty good about my risk of sudden cardiac death after evaluating the lifestyle factors. There's room for improvement for sure - I need to work on getting in more dedicated exercise, and I'm still working on getting my BMI down to where it should be, but overall, I think I'm doing the right things for my health. And that makes me feel good.

FINALLY

2011-06-30T19:43:00.000-04:00

I've been a member of Weight Watchers (again) since December. As far as weight loss programs go, I like it - it's user-friendly, effective, and an overall healthy diet plan. And it has worked really well for me. I've lost 25 pounds, and then 6 weeks ago began gaining tiny little bits each week until my 25 pounds lost were really only 20 pounds. And that frustrated the hell out of me. Weeks where I would track every bite, exercise every day, and drink my water religiously would yield the same result as weeks where I slacked on exercise, loosened my portion sizes, and bought diet soda every day.

This week was the first week in over a month that I've seen a loss on the scale. And it makes no sense. I was at a wedding this past weekend, didn't track a thing, drank a bottle of wine, and got next to no exercise. When people talk about lack of motivation to keep going, this is it.

I am a rule-follower. Set something up as a rule, and I will follow to the best of my ability. And when I don't follow the rules, I blame myself for the consequences. But weight loss isn't like that. It's not linear, even though we measure it that way. Weight loss does not always follow "If this, then that" causality. Sure, if you look at the broad picture, it does, but I'm talking week-to-week, because that's how I measure my weight. Over 6 months, what I've done has added up to loss overall. But what I did this past week should not.

This is the hardest thing for me to grasp and accept. That I can follow the rules and not necessarily see the result I want. I'm an achiever, that's how I roll. And I have difficulty having faith that if I keep following the rules, it will even out eventually. Instead, I choose to mostly close my eyes, try to do the right thing, and push through.

Undecided

2011-06-27T11:57:00.000-04:00

Why is it that days off seem to go much faster than the work week? I was out of town for a cousin's wedding this weekend, and I'm so glad I ended up taking today off...I needed to recuperate from my travels!

Weddings have always been something of a double-edged sword for me. It's fun to get dressed up and let go a bit. I enjoy seeing my extended family, since they live far away and I don't get to visit with them all that often. But I always end up somehow feeling like the clock of my life just sped up and I can't slow it down.

I haven't yet decided whether I want to get married or not. It's not like this is a question on the immediate horizon of my life, but I feel like my ambivalence probably affects my dating life as a whole. I don't want to get into a relationship without really understanding what I want. The truth is, I'm not someone who is unhappy being single. I don't love it 100% of the time, but the amount of time I spend feeling satisfied with my life is somewhere in the 90% range. I haven't decided whether having someone else will enhance that feeling or not.

That's not to say that I'm opposed to the idea of marriage - I'm just not sure if it's right for me or not. I suppose the answer to that question may depend on who I meet or date and how I feel about them. But sometimes I think I hang in dating limbo because I'm afraid I will meet someone I truly care about, and then I'll have to give up my single life, my cherished time to myself, and make room in my routine for someone else. It seems silly, doesn't it? Either choice leaves me grieving for the loss of the other...

The Seven Year Itch

2011-06-23T10:32:00.001-04:00

after a seven-year hiatus, i finally made my way back to my blog...

i actually had thought that my blog had magically vanished into the ether of the internet. what happens to all the old pages that no one ever looks at? there's a tree-falling-in-the-forest question in there somewhere...

i just went through and read all my old blog entries from when i posted on a regular basis...its funny to think of what's changed and what hasn't....

i'm back...seven years wiser (or seven years older, at least) and with a new perspective on the whole blogging thing. who knows what comes next?

2004-09-10T18:53:00.000-04:00

Welcome to the World...

Olivia Lynn Griffith
9/9/04
7 lbs 4 oz
20 inches
Congrats Becca and John! (and Aunt Emily too...)

2004-03-09T18:24:00.000-05:00

i saw the passion of the christ today, and i can't say that i loved it or i hated it, but i will say that it made me think. not so much about the religious ideas surrounding the crucifixion but about the process of the movie and what it accomplished. i came up with a few conclusions.

** to start, my medical-mind has a huge quibble with the film, and though i know it doesn't really have anything to do with the point of it, i found myself utterly distracted from the quarter-point onward by the fact that the violence is ridiculous. it is ridiculous. no one would have lived through that scourging. never mind the fact that the 40 lashes were actually 72 (i counted), when they dragged him away, there were about 6 units of blood left on the ground - this is certainly enough to send someone into shock such that they would certainly be unconscious if not dead already. if that wasn't enough, the crown of thorns would have certainly finished the job - the skull is one of the most vascularized areas of the body, which means that when it is pierced, it bleeds profusely. to expect that a person with that kind of injury externally (i won't go into what must have occurred as internal injuries) would then be able to walk let alone carry anything is absurd. and i'm sure there are all sorts of arguments why this doesn't really matter, or how God gave jesus the strength to keep going to carry out this ultimate plan, but i think most who belive in God would agree that God made our bodies, including the way they work. if jesus was, indeed, a human form of God, his physical body would be just as fragile as anyone's, no matter how transcendant his spirit. this may not matter to most who see the film, but it mattered to me, because i felt that the complete lack of realism in this aspect meant that the rest of the movie lost some meaning.

** i wasn't at all impressed by the acting, particularly jim caviezel as jesus. granted, he spent most of the movie bleeding everywhere and dying, which didn't exactly give him much range to work with, but overall, i was underwhelmed by the portrayal of the characters. the most impressive was pilate, followed by mary (jesus mother), though neither had a whole lot of range either.

** visually, it was a beautiful film. the attention to details, even in the areas of violence, contributed to an artistically stunning film. though the violence was disturbing and extremely gross, it made me feel things. i don't always feel things while watching a movie. but during this film i was in turn saddened, grossed out, frustrated, exasperated, and angry. not many films make me go through so many emotions that haven't been manufactured by plot points. i think that less could have been more where the violence was concerned, but that was mel gibson's choice, and i'm sure there are many who disagree with it.

** i found it ironic, given the amount of blood shed by jesus, that i saw this film using a free pass that i got from donating blood. i can't really recommend paying to see it (though i guess you could say i paid in blood, all pun intended) but if you have a chance to see it for free, it may be worth the discussion it can create more than the entertainment of something like "eurotrip".

2004-03-02T19:39:00.000-05:00

taking it on the chin...

okay, so i got sucker-punched by bryan for not updating my blog more frequently, and my answer is this...i have a real job. so there.

that being said, here are a few little tidbits until i can come up with something really interesting to say.

-- taxes suck. i just finished mine, and goddam local tax in maryland just ate half my federal refund. AND, someone told me today that they read in a magazine that maryland has the ugliest population in the country. to be fair, florida had the stupidest population, and i think that is worse.

-- i regret to say that i watched the finale of average joe...it started out innocently - i started watching the show halfway through when i realized that a person i knew from my cleveland days came on as one of the "hunks" who also happened to be a jackass, and i really only wanted to watch until he got kicked off. but the part of me that requires completion in all things couldn't leave it alone. it also sucked. see bryan's blog for the whole recap. i agree wholeheartedly with all his conclusions and i would add only that my first thought when she revealed the "shocking secret" was "who's fabio?"

-- i got to see the chihuly exhibit in columbus this weekend, and also got to see leno tagliapietra's work at the columbus art museum. glass is beautiful.

-- golfers are big freaking babies. i watched the match play between tiger woods and davis love III with my dad this weekend. if it wasn't tiger complaining that people were TAKING PICTURES of him (the nerve), it was davis love having a fan ejected for chanting "no love" during the match (which he deserved, as he was sucking terribly). i like to think that for prize money of $1.2 million and $700,000 respectively, they ought to be able to play through some heckling.

2004-01-30T18:41:00.000-05:00

An Ode To The Rounders...

Everyday we've assembled, white coats and papers in tow...we huddle together around the tables that move and talk about the heart, the lungs, the kidneys, the gut. Decisions are made and suggestions discussed. On our good days, people are made well, on our bad days, they get sicker.

And in between the seriousness, there were smiles, and laughter, and jokes, and looks, and nudges, and fun...lots of fun. In some cases there were train whistles, and in others there were bumper cars, and as recently as today there were whispers and giggles. And though a new team of rounders will start on Monday, the January group will always be legendary.

You guys turned the "frown" upside down in January...you rock.

2004-01-26T20:21:00.000-05:00

New Year, New Post

So one of my new year's resolutions was to post to my blog more frequently. Clearly that's not been happening....but I'm gonna try...I promise.

I also planned to make my blog less of a downer...post more happy and interesting things....but as you'll see, that's not happening yet either.

I watched a man die today. It was a completely surreal and crazy experience. I've seen many dead people before...I work in a hospital, in the Intensive Care Unit, so death unfortunately comes with the territory. And there's definite truth to the idea that people are not themselves when they are hooked up to machines...somehow they seem less human. And I don't mean that in a dispassionate way, but rather a practical way.

But today, it was different - it was faster. We've all seen how it happens on ER, and though there isn't any fast-paced music or cameras spinning around the room, the rest of it was more or less accurate. There are maybe 20 people of different specialties around the patient, people yell out orders, and everyone wears protective gear. They "shock" the person in hopes of getting a heart rhythm to work with, but the paddles don't actually make the person jump a foot off the bed. The alarms aren't nearly as loud as they are on TV, and the "time of death" call is much less dramatic. All of this is to be expected.

What wasn't expected was seeing the patient sitting up on the side of the bed 40 minutes before he was pronounced dead. I didn't expect that there would actually be blood all over the floor. I didn't expect that the clean-up after the code would take more than twice as long as the code itself. I didn't expect to hear the attending physician speak to the family and break the bad news over the phone. I didn't expect for my friends the residents to be as shaken by it as I was (the fact that the patient was alert and oriented up until his heart stopped beating seemed to make people more uncomfortable). And somehow I wasn't prepared for the ease with which the staff went on with our day when the lives of the patient's family had changed so dramatically.

Death is a funny thing...its something I can say for certain that I have no understanding of, and my experience today didn't make things any clearer. There are any number of cliches that are often used when someone dies, especially someone we know, but somehow they don't fit when someone we don't know dies in front of our eyes. And there is no eloquent way to end the post about this experience, I just felt like I needed to document it somehow.

I'm hoping to have happy things to post next time...stay tuned.

2003-11-05T08:26:00.000-05:00

Daisy Adams 1990-2003

She was the best dog anyone could ever have.

2003-10-29T19:21:00.000-05:00

sick...and halloween

so the emotional lack of energy has managed to turn itself into actual lack of energy in the form of a killer cold that i can't seem to shake. its going on 5 days now. and it started out relatively benign - a simple sore throat, corrected with water, lozenges (sp?), and sleeping with the humidifier. but it was not to be denied...after plenty of rest and fluids, my sore throat decided it had been short-changed and moved into my nose and chest, causing all kinds of disgusting secretions that the normal human body has the good sense to repress. so here i lay, quite hoarse with a completely non-productive cough just waiting for the clock to show me the time i can take the next dose of medicine out of the sam's club size box next to me. the pinnacle happened today at work...i wanted to give blood (to keep up my every-56-days streak), but was told in quite the patronizing voice "no, you can't donate blood when you have a cold. you'll just have to wait."

and on top of all this, i need to think of a costume. there are plans to go out this weekend to many a halloween party downtown, and my friend insists we all have to dress up. any ideas anyone?

2003-10-22T19:17:00.000-04:00

desperately seeking a new post...

i've been thinking for days about something to write a new post about. but i can't come up with anything good. everything i think of is either too trite or too personal...some things are best not shared on a blog.

what i can come up with is this...energy and psychology are inextricably linked, though i am not sure how. when life is good, and i am happy, i have boundless energy. i go to the gym everyday, my dishes are always done, and i stay up until midnight reading books and the internet. when life sucks (as it has recently), i'm always tired. i go to the gym and drag my ass through the workout, the dishes pile up (as does the laundry), and all i want to do is go to bed every night at 9 pm.

now, i took physics in college...i know the Newton's law "energy cannot be created or destroyed, it can only change form". so my question is this - what "form" is psychological energy in? and how are these two things linked scientifically? anyone know?

2003-09-28T16:28:00.000-04:00

Odds 'n' Ends

* Today was an absolutely beautiful day here in Baltimore. The sun is shining, it is about 70 degrees outside with a light breeze, and there a just the few wispy clouds in an otherwise bright blue sky. I went for chai at Starbucks and walked outside for awhile and somehow felt like I was in the middle of a movie. Days like this remind me how oddly beautiful the world is, with a hurricane just 2 weeks ago and today not a speck of evidence that it ever happened.

* Went to see "Under the Tuscan Sun" yesterday...I would recommend it. I think its a very sweet film that doesn't try too hard to be anything special, but I found it somewhat inspiring. It reminded me that frequently in our lives, we focus on one thing that we want/don't have and in doing so, miss out on the joy of the events that go on around us in pursuit of that one thing. Like the joy of a beautiful day (see #1). Plus, the movie has an extended scene of a young man doing "flag throwing" - a male flaggot! (Flaggot = (n.) an individual who puts on a costume and flips a flag around in order to impress and audience. This often occurs with musical accompaniment frequently in the form of a marching band).

* Spent Friday night with friends at a tavern in Mt. Washington. Do you have friends who are "conversation killers"? I really think that as a society we need to spend more time teaching people how to make conversation. This is not a commentary on shyness - I understand about people who are shy. My best friend Lisa is quite shy, but still one of the most interesting people I've known. And she's good at conversation. There were several people who attended our gathering who were maybe the worst conversationalists I've ever met. Learn how to talk to people. Don't let your legacy be that you're bad at conversation.

* I always bring a sweater to the grocery store. Someone once told me this was weird, which made me somewhat self conscious. But today, as I walked down the frozen foods aisle, and put my sweater on to protect against the inevitable chill that comes from the opening and closing of the doors, an older woman looked at me and said "That is so smart. I always get cold in grocery stores, but I never remember to bring a sweater." So there.

* My tivo recorded the "Anna Nicole Smith Show", somehow thinking that would be something I might like to watch. I was curious, so I watched some of it. She scares me.

2003-09-14T13:44:00.000-04:00

Welcome to the AC...

I know that you've been waiting on pins and needles for the recap of the trip to Atlantic City. Don't try to deny it.

Okay, so after an ear-ly morning flight in and a quick nap, we got started with the birthday celebrations...this involved a little shopping, lunch, plans for the trip, and subsequently dinner (Chinese food and beer) and an educational video (Ocean's Eleven - because if you can't win in casinos, it's good to have a backup plan) - man, do we know how to party or what?

We got up the next morning and got ready to go. We made a stop for money, coffee, and food and set on our way to the East Coast version of sin city. We spent approximately $12 on tolls just to get there, which we complained about profusely until we realized that it was entirely possible to drop twice that amount of money in less than 2 hours once we got there. At that point, we made a pact to quit complaining about money. We broke that pact many, many times.

We got to our hotel, which was crazy cool (thanks mommy and daddy) and promptly checked in to our room with a view. The bathroom was roughly the size of the bedroom I inhabited in NYC. After spending a little time in the sun and then the gym (aren't we good?), we decided it was time to go to the casino. We promptly declared our status as "low rollers" by 1) not knowing how to work the coinless slot machines; 2) embarrassing ourselves at the cashier's window by trying to change money into, well, money; and 3) looking like squirrels trying to cross a highway while looking at the blackjack, craps, and roulette tables. Sadly, there are no pictures of this. We also learned the lesson that the casino will give free watered down drinks as long as you sit at a slot machine long enough for the waitress to come back, which is roughly the amount of time it takes the lose the cost of the drink in the machine. But hey, its fun, right?

The second day, we woke up, got some coffee, and decided to hit the boardwalk. The weather was beautiful, and we tried to see the highlights, including the steel pier. We also stopped into some of the other casinos, shops, and restaurants along the way. At the Tropicana, we bought tickets for a comedy show later that night. After another day in the sun, we went back to rest up for the rest of the night.

The evening included dinner at the noodle bar, where it turns out that broth noodles are quite like salad (in that you eat and eat and eat and yet nothing disappears). Then we headed back over to "The Comedy Stop at the Trop" for an evening of drinks and giggles. Of course, we were early getting there, which left us sufficient amounts of time to lose some money at the casino - and get really freaked out by the old (and obviously well-seasoned) guy sitting next to Lo at the video poker machines.

Then the fun really started. During the course of the comedy show, the main act decided to make Laura part of the show - and he didn't even know it was her birthday celebration. This involved some harmless comments at first, and quickly escalated to a serenade and a trip to the stage for Laura (she was mortified, I was merely angry about the "no flash photography" rule). All in all, it was good fun and lots of laughs. We left the next day a little lighter in the pockets and the heart, with some solid sister bonding completed before Laura's semester in London.

Maybe next time, we'll be brave enough to try the table games...

Pre AC.JPG
The room 2.JPG
The view.JPG
The bathroom.JPG
The Boardwalk.JPG
Steel Pier.JPG

(just so you know, i tried to be cool and put the pictures in as links from the words. but apparently, i'm not that cool...)

2003-09-09T22:33:00.000-04:00

Still in the works...

I plan to post more detailed recap of the weekend in Atlantic City (complete with pictures), but frankly, I'm a bit tired right now...it's always a long first day back to work, even after a short vacation, and I really just want to sleep...

So stay tuned, hopefully the post and pictures will be available tomorrow...

2003-09-04T19:28:00.000-04:00

21

No, this is not a new Kiefer Sutherland drama where the characters actually sleep for 3 hours...today is my little sister Lo's 21st birthday. It's amazing how the time goes by...I can very clearly recall being little with her and playing together. Here are some of the highlights...

* Maple Town - I don't know whatever happened to this, I suppose it was replaced by Pokemon and Teletubbies, but this was something we truly enjoyed. I can distinctly remember the excitement of new "families" and the Maple Town house. Good times.
* Sharing a room - Lo used to sing me to sleep when we shared a room. My favorite was "Little bunny foo foo hoppin' through the for-est, scooping up the field mice and bopping them on the head!"
* Christmas Eve - for many years, we would share a bed on Christmas Eve and speculate about the morning to come. Then I became older and stupid and put an end to this practice, but I feel really bad about it. I even shamed her into staying with me last year :)

As Lo got older, the inevitable sibling tensions were there, and Maple Town was no longer cool...but she's a remarkable woman. One of my favorite memories is the night she was elected President of the Band for her senior year of high school. Our parents were on vacation in Alaska for their 25th wedding anniversary, so I was the one who got to be there with her. I was so proud, I almost cried. Then we celebrated by going to Steak 'n' Shake for milkshakes and fries. That was a good night.

So happy birthday, Lo. And brush up on that poker face for a weekend full of fun in Atlantic City! Stay tuned for pictures...

(For other tributes to Lo, see Bryan's blog)

2003-08-27T17:39:00.000-04:00

time for a new post...

i'm reading george stephanopoulos' book about the clinton administration call "all too human: a political education" which is unbelievably interesting. it actually reads like a novel. and an episode of west wing. somewhere in the middle. but its a very interesting look at the inside of clinton's politics (and it may get into the other stuff too, i just haven't gotten there yet). thus far, it has brought me to the same conclusion i felt at the time...clinton was a good president. he may have been a crappy person, and a shitbag for a husband, but as a president - he did some good, or at least he tried to. and i really do believe that. he was certainly a politician, and he was very good at the game of politics, but i suspect (and like i said, i'm not to this point in the book yet), his lie to the country was more the result of poor counseling on the political "spin" of things than an actual malicious witholding of information. but we'll see.

i'll keep you posted (no pun intended)...

2003-08-08T23:20:00.000-04:00

tidbits...

*going to columbus for the start of my vacation, and this time i'm flying, but last weekend i was driving, and i noticed so many little driving idiosyncracies that i have. i talk to the other drivers quite a bit. i say things like "are we carting rocks in our trunk, mister mazda protoge? then MOVE OVER." and "the left lane is not a good place to live. try the suburbs."

*arnold schwartznegger running for governor of california. are we kidding here? he's not even a very good actor. if california elects him, then they deserve him. so there.

*books. i have tons of unread books in my apartment (mostly because i really enjoy buying books as much as i enjoy reading them) but this week i went to the public library and took out yet more books to read. i'm actually getting through these, though. i love places with lots of books. i almost passed out from happiness at the library.

*playstation. once i start, i just can't stop. i feel that, normally, i don't have the world's best attention span. but put me in front of tetris, and it seems that moving little blocks into larger squares and getting rid of lines can hold my attention indefinitely. i usually stop when my thumbs start to hurt. what do you suppose tetris says about my personality?

2003-07-29T17:33:00.000-04:00

amazing

it never ceases to amaze me how many people leave a "wrong number" message on my answering machine. since i've lived here (almost 4 months) i've gotten about 15 messages on my answering machine from people looking for peaches, jerry, angie, mike, and jimbo. just so that you understand what's happening here, you should know that the outgoing message on my answering machine is, literally, "hi, this is emily, leave a message." not only do people not realize that they are dialing the wrong number, but when they hear this message, they STILL proceed to leave a message for peaches, jerry, angie, mike, or jimbo. on one day, i actually got 3 separate wrong number messages. i've even called the machine myself to make sure that the outgoing message doesn't mistakenly give the impression that i am peaches, jerry, angie, mike, or jimbo - it doesn't.

by the way, don't take this post as an invitation to start calling me and saying "this is peaches/jerry/angie/mike/jimbo - have there been any messages for me?

2003-07-23T17:40:00.000-04:00

another casualty...

awhile back, i did a post about my unique ability to make things that are electronic inexplicably stop working. i'm very sad to report that there has been another death in the electronics family. the tivo, which brought me such joy not so long ago, decided yesterday to succumb early on in its life to the supernatural forces surrounding, namely, my own touch. (does this mean it died of "supernatural causes"?)

at any rate, the tivo is now sitting like a plastic piece of nothing on my living room floor, awaiting the exchange process, so that the new tivo can come in and take over. the only good thing about this situation is that i seem to only break things once. of course, the criteria for breaking it is that
1) i have to use it all the time,
2) it must be really expensive to begin with, and
3) it must be a complete hassle to go the process of getting it fixed.

optional characteristics include
1) it is outside of the warranty period
2) the tech support person says "huh. we've never had THAT happen before"

all i can say is, they should have put ME in the matrix. i could have f***ed that stuff up right from the start.

2003-07-20T11:52:00.000-04:00

things that make me happy....

* my new TiVo...not watching commercials rocks. that's all that needs to be said.
* "friends"...just watching joey's eyebrows emote is enough to make me smile, even on my worst day. and season 4 just came out on DVD...good times.
* "Autobiography of a Fat Bride" by Laurie Notaro - I'm only halfway through this book and it has made me laugh out loud no less than 5 times so far.
* this summer - thus far, not ungodly hot, but with multiple very nice days in the last couple of weeks...i mean, sure, it's rained a lot, but its the middle of july and the door to my balcony is open and i'm not sweating.
* the ghoul in my toilet. it makes random noises when it feels like it. the maintenance people for my apartment came to fix it, and it seemed to be fixed for several days - but i think the ghoul was just hanging out in my washing machine for awhile until the coast was clear. we're becoming friends.

things that make me unhappy....

* this article...i hate george bush.
* people who ask me "what do you think of the Atkins' diet?" - please. quick weight loss that lasts forever - wouldn't we all be really skinny if it worked?
* bills. does this really need explanation?
* junk email...it's completely inevitable, one of the only sure things in this world. it WILL be there when you check your email, there's just no getting around it.

2003-06-22T22:23:00.000-04:00

murphy's law...

saturday was the release date for harry potter and the order of the pheonix. i love the harry potter series, and have been on the pre-order list from amazon for several months (though not quite as long as lo). amazon had a "deal" where you could pre-order the book and have guaranteed delivery on the date of release. my sister opted for this as well, and ended up having her copy of the book sent to my apartment. we waited. and waited. and waited some more. it wasn't as bad for me, i had to work, but my poor sister sat in my apartment literally all day waiting for the books to be delivered (because, of course, the deal is off if you aren't there to sign for it). the shipping info said it would be there by 8pm. at this point, i left to go to the store for a few items...and lo and behold, there is a stack of harry potter books for a price that was less than the "deal" from amazon. since our copies hadn't arrived yet, i picked up two of them and took them home.

and, about 5 minutes after i walked in the door, the fed ex person showed up bearing two copies of the book. so now i have two. and so does my sister. does anyone need one?

here are the pics - note laura demonstrating both frustration and joy...

Lo joy.JPG
Lo mad.JPG

2003-06-12T17:36:00.000-04:00

never happy

don't you think its funny that humans are never completely comfortable? there's always something that could change (the only exception to this rule is laying on my couch in the living room watching friends and eating yummy food...)

it finally stopped raining here in baltimore for, like, a day. and it got hot that day. and all i heard about at work was how hot it was and how we needed more rain to cool things off. i was thinking - are you people crazy? it rained for a whole month (and i'm pretty sure i'm not exaggerating this)...then one nice, albeit slightly warm, day and everyone's panties are in a bunch.

the same thing is true with standing and sitting. after you have been standing for awhile, nothing looks better than a chair to plop down in. but sit around for a good hour, and you'll be dying to stretch your legs. its crazy. and it reminds me of something i read in a biology textbook once. it was something like "the human body must always be at a disequilibrium in order to perform functions. a body that has reached complete equilibrium is dead." ironic, isn't it? we search for comfort and the only time we physiologically find it is when we die.

and sadly, the date with the guy from work will likely be a one-time thing. he wasn't as interested in me as i was in him. butt munch.

2003-06-09T18:05:00.000-04:00

long time coming...
okay, okay....so its been awhile since i've blogged. and frankly, i would like to say that it is because i was SOOO busy and just couldn't find the time, but that's not true. i would like to say its because i was moving/starting new job/etc (a la Lo). but that's also not true. and, i would like to pretend that a hacker ruined my page, thus rendering it essentially impossible to post (a la Bryan). but, alas, still not true. i just didn't have anything interesting/funny/insightful to say.

and i still don't (aww, you were getting excited, weren't you?). but there is news. for those of you who have been keeping the fingers and toes crossed that the guy from work would ask me out - thank you. your crossing has worked, and we are finally going out tonight. now, in order to give credit where credit it due, i have to acknowledge my sister, my father, my mother (for kicking me in the ass to get things moving), and finally my friend monica - for literally helping me when my motor skills failed me.

now, go back to crossing those fingers and toes that we'll have fun and he'll ask me out AGAIN...

2003-05-29T17:48:00.000-04:00

the phone book...

do you ever use the phone book anymore? and i don't mean the yellow pages - though the internet has made those obsolete as well. how about the regular old phone book, where people just have their phone numbers listed for anyone to call?

i don't. i haven't for a long time. if i need to call someone or somewhere, i either have the number, or i look it up online. i just had telephone books delivered to me this week, and at the moment i haven't even unwrapped them because i just don't need them.

and then i was thinking about when i was younger, i can distinctly remember looking up friends' phone numbers in the phone book...i couldn't remember them all, so i would just look them up when i needed them. and there was nothing weird about that. now, if someone i knew marginally called me up and said they found my number in the phone book, i think i would be a little taken aback. maybe that's because it seems like it requires so much effort.

i think the fact that so many people use cell phones for their daily phoning needs is another factor. just about everyone i talk to is programmed into my cell phone. i don't even need their numbers anymore. will we ever have a cell phone book? to look up numbers? or will we simply bypass the archaic paper step and go straight to an internet directory of cell phone numbers?

2003-05-24T19:24:00.000-04:00

a couple of notes on things that annoy me...

i went to see the movie 'identitiy' today - which, by the way, is very good, and you should go see it now. go. now. go on. okay, you can read the rest first. one of the trailers was for 'pirates of the caribbean', and there's a line where a girl hits a guy with a shovel and says something like - "you think you know pain? try wearing a corset." and a girl in the back of the theater goes "YEAH" and then a whole bunch of women start to clap. now i think to myself - "what do any of you know about wearing a corset?" just because we are women doesn't mean that we are any more in tune with that kind of pain than the insolent man who was hit with the shovel. i hate it when people are stupid like that.

and another thing - i think the line "the united states doesn't negotiate with hostage takers/terrorists" should not be allowed in movie scripts ever again. never. because what this really means is - "we will get dangerously close to negotiating when it looks like we have no other option to get back the super important person who is being held hostage...but in the end, the hero will save that person and we won't have to negotiate. HAH!" again, just plain stupidity. this actually harkens back to a blog by bryan, where he spoke about stupid movie lines. i recommend you check it out.

by the way, there was a distinct lack of help on that last one - gold star to patricia for offering worthwhile advice...boys in general get zero points because none of you offered advice and he still hasn't asked me out (though i think we're getting close).

2003-05-22T20:38:00.000-04:00

help please...

okay. so i'm trying to get this guy at work to ask me out...i think he's interested, there have been signs, but the actual date thing isn't happening yet. and that's okay. i'm patient. i'm just wondering if there's something i can do to move the process along. any suggestions?

now, i know, i know - "why don't you ask HIM out?" and the answer is - i don't want to. i want him to ask me. and i'm willing to accept the ramifications of that (ie - he may never ask me). but guys do ask girls out sometimes. so what can girls do to make you want to ask them out? guys? input appreciated.

2003-05-18T21:50:00.000-04:00

just so cool

saw the matrix reloaded today...it reminded me of how i felt when i saw the first one. its just soooooo cool. man. i left there feeling like a total geek - no matter how hard i tried, if i tried for the rest of my life, i could never be that cool. for starters, i don't have enough all black, leather outfits. and my hair is blond. and i don't have super cool sunglasses. and i don't do anything that makes the world slow down and rotate 180 degrees.

it made me wonder how the really geeky people felt - and they were there. you know, the ones who are really interested in explaining the intricacies of the matrix to those who are less enlightened. i wonder what they do to feel cooler...maybe they blog about it...

2003-05-14T18:26:00.000-04:00

water balloons and men

you may not know it, but this week is "hospital week" (you know, like last week was nurses week, etc. everyone should have a week). today, to celebrate, the hospital where i work had a big picnic with free food for all the employees and a "water run" where employees coule pay money to buy squirt guns, super soakers, and water balloons to throw/shoot at their managers and supervisors who ran through in groups. it was quite fun actually, much more so than i thought it would be, and the sun was out, people were laughing, everyone got wet...good times. of course, then we all had to go back inside and go back to work. the water balloon thing was such a distraction, i felt off my game the rest of the day due to lack of sunlight.

as for men, well...isn't that self-explanatory?

2003-05-10T20:51:00.000-04:00

do you do this?

i was driving to the airport the other day to pick up a friend, and since i'm new to the area, i've not driven there before and i noticed something...

when i drive around in unfamiliar places, my first instinct is to turn down the radio. seriously. the more unfamiliar and unsure i feel about a place, the quieter the radio gets, even when i'm alone - as if making the radio quieter will somehow make it easier for me to follow my written directions or intuit the way i should go. i find it funny...these two things are unrelated, and yet, the minute i need to pay attention to where i am, my hand goes to the radio knob.

what weird things do you do?

2003-05-07T22:24:00.000-04:00

the other night i was watching MTV (not actually in an attempt to improve my popular music knowledge) and i am deeply ashamed to admit how much i enjoy watching "sorority life" and "fraternity life". it is particularly good right now because there is a girl on SL who is digging a guy on FL, and that relationship is definitely not mutual. i have to say that the girl is an idiot, and the guy is an asshole, but it makes for some seriously good drama, including dinners at applebee's where pseudoserious conversations take place, including:
FL guy: i just need you to know that if i kiss you, it will takes things to a whole other level, and i'm just not ready for that
SL girl: oh, i know, and i'm NOT asking for that at ALL (emphasis included)

see, the funny part is that this entire conversation is bullshit. the guy doesn't want to kiss the girl because he thinks she's annoying (which she is). and the girl is most certainly asking the guy to take the relationship to the other level (TOTALLY asking for that ALL). it makes me laugh - how much of their behavior is due to the cameras, and how much (gulp) their true personalities? and why is it that these people take the "confessional" thing so seriously - don't they realize that TONS of people will see what they say when it's all over? i'm baffled...and yet somehow intrigued.

2003-05-06T23:01:00.000-04:00

yay, the computer is back! of course, they had to replace the mother board, the fan, and do several other things that amounted to my losing all data on my hard drive, but i'm tricksy - i had backups :)

in honor of my computer's return, i feel it appropriate to explain why it was gone in the first place. i break all things electrical. and, in fact, the more complex and computerized, the more likely that i will break it. i have a particular propensity to make computers die. you think i am kidding - i am not.

the first computer to succumb to my electromagnetic force field was an IBM thinkpad that was approximately 14 months old, and therefore just out of warranty. i hadn't even used the computer all that much (i also had a desktop at the time), but after 14 months - hard drive completely dead.

the second computer was the predecessor to the one i use now. a toshiba satellite, a nice computer, better than the thinkpad. at 15 months - hard drive dead. that one happened on the eve of a big assignment that was due, and subsequently was lost, requiring an extension from my professor and a complete do-over by me. thanks.

now, i know what you're thinking - that's only 2 computers (even given the problems with your current one, that's not so bad)...but you're wrong. the problems with my current computer notwithstanding (and some of those i can blame on a design flaw that didn't manifest itself until the computer became mine), there have been other appliances that have suffered in the wake of my destruction...

my parents desktop computer, which they don't really even use that much (they both have laptops...we are a computerized family). i don't remember how old it was, but i came home for one weekend during grad school, used it 3 times to check my email, and the next thing we all know - hard drive dead.

i got a palm pilot for christmas last year...the first one didn't work...we thought it was the cradle, but it turned out to just not work...my fault? maybe...

i had an mp3 player that refused to work with my new computer - so my parents stupidly bought me a newer, nicer one...it likes me so far, but i think that's because i keep it away from my other appliances...

the list goes on, but i'll close with this - my television currently has an intermittent problem where the sound just cuts out for no reason. this can be fixed by either 1)beating the computer on the side, or 2) messing with the volume control until it comes back. i find that option 2 works better than option one. i'm not the boss of my tv, who am i kidding? it just wants me to know that it can break at any point in time - it merely tolerates my ownership of it.

2003-04-30T07:29:00.000-04:00

whenever you put a bunch of dietitians in a room together and try to feed them funny things happen...

first, everyone only seems to eat about half of whatever they take. this include sandwiches that are already cut in half, muffins, bagels, etc. there are several exceptions to this rule, including bowls of mixed fruit and salad (though they use only half of the little dressing packet).

then, everyone goes back to the food source approximately 4 times to get more things that they only eat half of - like cookies, pieces of cake/pie, more fruit, potato chips, pretzels, etc. if they would just eat everything they took the first time, they probably wouldn't need to go back. at least, they would need to go back only 2 times instead of 4 or something like that.

they also spend a lot of time saying things like "i haven't had chocolate chip cookies in months" which you know is a complete lie, and "i have the best recipe for fat free, low salt, low cholesterol tuna salad" which unfortunately is probably true.

the funny thing is, everyone seems to wait to see what all the other dietitians are going to do before they choose their own food...is this going to be a group that follows the Food Guide Pyramid at lunch? or is this a group the enjoys cookies and other fun things at lunch?

i will be away from blogging for about a week as i have to send my computer in for repairs :( please do come back soon! i promise to be more regular in my blogging!

2003-04-27T20:02:00.000-04:00

ok, ok...after a seriously harsh comment from my sister :(

whew, what a week. the new job is good - coworkers are definitely cool (and i'm not just saying that - they don't even know i have a blog), apartment is good, and had a really fun night at a birthday party last night. it was actually in the style of a "roast" which always makes me picture the person in question on a big stick with an apple in his mouth turning over and over to get the nice rotisserie (sp?) taste. but its not that literal. for those of you who don't know what a roast is, its basically a party where people get up and tell embarassing stories about the guest of honor. last night's was particularly fun, because the guest of honor is a guy who quite enjoys laughing at himself, so there were no barriers. and there were some funny stories.

it made me think of what stories people could tell about me if i were to be roasted. (and bear in mind, i am only 24 - the guest of honor last night was 65!) there were far too many. here are a few that come to mind:

- my first experience backing the car out of the driveway...i won't give all the details (though my brother and sister probably will in the comments - stay tuned) but let's just say that i ended up in the front yard - twice.
- my first week of sixth grade, where i tried to sneak into the auditorium and ended up falling on my face with everyone looking at me.
- sophomore year of college on the WORST DAY OF MY LIFE (up to that point) - falling down in the middle of Adelbert Road, ripping my favorite jeans and literally stopping traffic in the process (emphasis added for my father who is laughing his ass off as he reads this - he found this one particularly humorous)

so what are yours?

2003-04-21T21:51:00.000-04:00

so today was my first day of work...my first day in the "real world" if you will. can i just say - holy shit. i didn't realize that the real world came with so much paperwork. i spent most of the morning filling in my name, address, phone number, and social security number on a variety of forms for a variety of purposes...i couldn't tell you what they all were to save my life (and no, i won't give my name, address, phone number, and social security number to you, form or no)...

other than that, the real world felt distinctly like the unreal world, though the prospect that i could theoretically (theoretically, mind you) be at my new job for the rest of my life is a little bit frightening.

had fun with the lil sis this weekend. i recommend you check out the down lo for a quick recap and pictures...the highlights according to emmit:

** seeing the "redneck special" (we did not get a picture, sadly):
lo:"why do you suppose someone from new jersey drives through the balitmore ghetto with four confederate flags on his truck?"
emmit: "to distract attention from his mullet?" (in all fairness to mister r. special, we never actually saw a mullet...however, i have my suspicions that we are not far off...and come on, if he didn't have a mullet, can he truly call himself a redneck?)

** realizing that we are out of touch with popular music:
emmit: "who is this?"
lo: "i don't know."
emmit: "i need to watch more mtv."
lo: "hmmm. i'm not sure that's the answer."

** picking out familiar faces in the museum:
emmit: "that woman looks like someone i know."
lo: gives emmit a disgusted look and quickly shuffles away.

** picking out unfamiliar faces in passersby:
(man goes into store)
emmit: "was that him?"
lo: "no."
(man comes out of store)
emmit: "was that him?"
lo: (looks at man) "nope, still not him."

all in all, a good time bonding (awww, bonding, pet pet)...

2003-04-17T23:19:00.000-04:00

one of these days, i'm gonna get around to playing with my template - you know, spice it up a little...that'll reel 'em in...

okay, so what i was unsucessfully trying to post earlier was a little video clip sent to me (by someone i actually like) which consists of a power point presentation of 9/11 photographs and a song called "have you forgotten" which implies that opposing the war equates with forgetting that 9/11 happened and it sucked...i'm here to tell you that these two things are not equal. if i can eventually figure out how to upload the file (help me bryan!) i will post it for your own viewing...torture.

i highly recommend that you have a receptacle handy in the event that you feel (as i did) the sudden urge to vomit...

on a less political note...did anyone see Friends tonight? can you believe the hype that kiss got and it was only a dream? i'll tell you what...if it weren't my favorite show, and if i didn't have a completely useless encyclopedic knowledge of Friends trivia, i would totally quit watching after that shit...

2003-04-16T15:24:00.000-04:00

i saw this quote today, and though i am not a particularly religious person, i thought it was appropriate given that this sunday is easter and we have a president who believes that the will of God is war against one person with the end result of killing a whole lot of people.

(of the crucifixion of Jesus) "I don't pretend to understand any of it. Sometimes I think that the suffering of Jesus was not God's will at all. It was, instead, the will of those who were arrayed against him--those whose patriotic values he had offended, whose sense of God he had betrayed."

this quote struck me as being so profound when i think about the war...not that i would equate saddam hussein with Jesus by any means, but the idea that this war is not at all the will of God but rather the will of a president whose "patriotic values" have been offended and whose "sense of God" has been betrayed - i think this is an accurate description of our current military action. the most frightening part is that our president is not only unwilling to see the connection himself, but also completely unwilling to listen to any discourse on the subject. the label of "unpatriotic" has been propagated on anyone who is opposed to this war, and yet the term "patriotic" is completely in the eye of the beholder. and who is Bush to decide what is and is not patriotic? just because he has the money, clout, and name to force his way into the white house does not mean that he has a better understanding of the relationship of a country/government to its people than the average citizen. i dare say that it was never intended that one person get to decide what is "patriotic" - isn't that a defining characteristic of a dictatorship?

2003-04-15T20:15:00.000-04:00

ok, so i'm relatively new to this whole blog thing. the intro message was actually posted by my brother, who got me all set up with this - lest you think i'm a loser who posts happy birthday messages to myself online. but i have fun reading others, so...

by the way, i highly recommend matt's blog - an insightful friend of my brother's and the first blog i ever started reading.

i just moved into my own apartment in baltimore, and i have to say that so far i love living by myself. not that i ever really disliked any of my roommates...well, that's not entirely true - there were a couple that i would like to "rip my arm off just so i could throw it at her" (a quote from Friends), but for the most part, i've enjoyed those i lived with in the past. but there's really no substitute for doing your own thing whenever you want and however you want. sharing is great, but not sharing is even better! of course, i say all this prior to any of the bills coming...

2003-04-15T14:03:00.000-04:00

This is a test post. Happy birthday, and happy blogging, em!